Monday, March 10, 2014

Two Months


Saturday marked two months since I had weight loss surgery. 8 1/2 weeks to be exact. In some ways, that shocks me. It seems that time just keeps marching on like it is a gear shift stuck in hyper drive. Yet sometimes I feel like surgery was forever ago, as dealing with life post surgery has become more and more routine.

It is my routine to stop drinking water a half hour before and a half hour after I eat. It is routine for me to ditch the straw in cups as that puts air in my stomach, and that makes me feels odd. It is routine for me to bring my lunch to work, and to not even give a fleeting thought to all the sweets often laying around the office place.  It is routine for me to examine nutrition levels and work exceptionally hard to get all my protein in for the day (which is difficult, when I rarely feel like eating at all).

I'm starting to notice so many changes, both mentally and physically. I've lost a little over 67 pounds now, and while I know I'm still way fat, and I've got a long way to go, I feel so much more confident in the way I look. I think I present myself better as well.  I'm more interested in how I dress and wearing jewelry, before I didn't care, because I did not feel anything would make me look "better." I'm still working on make-up though, I'm really lazy about make-up. 

I love how my thighs look in jeans, and I'm still obsessed with my skinny, but strong, ankles. My fingers are smaller too, and sometimes when I snap my wrist too fast, my wedding ring will go flying off (I told Adam the only remedy to this situation is to get divorced obviously) .

In the best news of all, my leg pain has been much much better this month, making me think that when I lose a few more pounds, it might disappear altogether. 

I have yet to truly go down a size in my clothes (I don't think so anyway, I have yet to go shopping), but all my clothes are fitting better, and they are more flattering. I used to hate wearing jeans, thinking they were uncomfortable. Now I know they are not uncomfortable, they just did not fit well. I can also fit into a few pieces I grew too big for.

People compliment me all the time, and when I posted a picture on instagram recently, my niece told me I looked amazing. Hearing that from her, meant so much to me.

Everyone knows how much I love lists and "bucket lists," and I have started to mentally compile a list of things to accomplish with my new body eventually. This list includes big things like zip lining, surfing, and skydiving. But I also have simple things on the list like being able to cross my legs, shop in any store, and fly without worrying about what my passenger next to me is thinking about my size. I can't wait to start crossing things off this list. 

Of course, there have been some negatives. Occasionally, I really miss going out to eat on the weekends with Adam, when we would totally pig out, and have to waddle out of the restaurant. I do go out to eat some, but it feels like such a waste of money, when I eat so little. This weekend I got a 8 dollar sandwich in the food court, and I only ate a half of a half.

When I get a little down about what I can't eat right now, I just try and remember what my nutritionist says, "You are not on a diet, you are just eating healthy." I'm really starting to see food as fuel and nothing more.  

Ironically, sometimes I really, really miss having a soda. I find this funny because I wasn't a huge soda drinker before, but I crave that carbonation! Today, I had bought some flavored juice beverages, called Ice. I took a sip and immediately realized it was carbonated. I had to stop drinking it of course, but man that one little sip was heavenly!

The last week and a half I have been recovering from what seems to be chronic bronchitis.  I think all the congestion has been draining down into my stomach, which has given me a low level of nausea all week long, making me not want to eat anything at all. I've been having to force myself to eat, which is not fun, when you feel sick. But I'm finally starting to feel better and my queasiness is starting to improve as well.

In a new development, I have named my new stomach, Pompeii. Simply because it is prone to erupt, if I don't give it the respect it deserves. And yes, I have thrown up after trying new foods or taking one bite too many. It is unpleasant, but I swear I learn a little more about my health & body every time it happens.
 
At this point in time, I can honestly say the benefits outweigh the pitfalls. And I have no regrets yet. I'm excited to see what month three will bring.

3 comments:

  1. Brittany,

    You look AWESOME. You are so beautiful :) I LOVE that shirt on you - so very cheerful! I'm so bored with my neutrals. I can tell just by your pictures how happy you are - you are glowing! Glad to hear that your leg pain is decreasing. Keep up the great work. I am so proud of all your accomplishments!

    Love that you named your stomach Pompeii. You are so cute :)

    <3 Ash

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  2. Yes babes, well done! What you're going through is so personal and strangely public; it's really touching to read about. All I can say is you look absolutely incredible and keep going :)

    Sophie

    Http://your-girl-is-lovely.blogspot.co.uk

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  3. You look amazing B! So exciting,and I love that you are gaining confidence. Don't feel bad about makeup. Most men, and I'm sure Adam will agree with me on this, don't even like it. We wear makeup for other women. Match hates it when I wear makeup. So don't feel bad about that. Let your natural beauty shine!

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