A few days ago, my running app randomly sent me this "text". It totally made my day. It took until I ran my first ever half-marathon to finally think of myself as a "real" runner. Even though I've been doing this running thing for three and a half years now. I ran when I weighed almost 400 lbs, slow and waddling, but I ran. I did a handful of 5ks and a 10k, walking at first, and always finishing last.
It took me two whole years before I could get past the mental block I struggled with, and I was able to finish my first 5k RUNNING. And before I knew it, I was finishing in the middle of the pack.
I'm still not fast. I may never be. I'm OK with that. But I've gained so much with running. Running helps me better calm my monkey mind (my anxiety and depression). It give me confidence, that I don't feel on a daily basis. It makes me feel strong.
I don't know what is going to happen at the marathon. I know I can finish it, I do not know if I can finish it within the time constraints that I have to finish it in. But I'm hopeful. Win or lose. Fail or fly, I will be proud of myself. And if I lose, I will just try again. Just as I kept doing 5ks, until I met my goals.
My bags are packed and only a 6 hour work day stands between me and Orlando. Disney world here I come!
But a big shout out to the Nike app for reminding me that even in those early days, I was a runner, and if I fail on Sunday, I won't be any less of a runner than I am today.
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